snow

snow is great until...you have a sick baby that needs to go to the doctor and the roads are covered with snow:( chesley's appointment is at 3:15 so maybe the roads will be better then!

pictures

and seriously when we find the charger for the camera and dan teaches me how to live in 2010 i will be posting pictures with every blog! i'm looking forward to showing off my beautiful girls:) yep i brag:) but they are truly amazing and perfect and make me cry with complete love happiness and fulfillment they are what keeps me breathing and i will always brag!

(oh and i do not do commas and periods so you will notice everything from here on is very stream-of-conciousness...i do apologize for any difficulty in reading it may present)

complex conversation

is there a delicate way to discuss psychology with a 7 year old? i just tried...tough one though.  chesley and charsy were climbing on my oh so fabulous four legged walker. my walker has little side rails for lack of a better description. charsy climbed up to the top rails and chesley was trying to climb to the secondary side rails but her head was hitting charsy's crotch. (i am aware of frued's second stage of the psychosexual stages...the anal complex stage taking place around ages 1-2. i am aware chesley is very much into this bottom thing...and other peoples bottoms.) so i tried very gingerly to explain to charsy that we didn't want to encourage the behavior of chesley ramming her head into charsy's, or anyones, bottom. charsy thought it was hysterical and yes once funny but repeatedly...no. so the conversation included the word complex (not anal just complex) and charsy, 7, said "what's that" thus i explained how people could get a strange way of thinking about an act or an object that hinders them in some way potentially (look i was on the spot) to which charsy replied i don't know any of what you just said and hopped off the walker. i just gave a giggle of relief and finished my walk to the dishwasher.

makeup

so my skin is extremely sensitive! i cannot wear any base or powder because i will break out within a couple hours of putting it on my skin.  does anyone have any recommendations?

happy birthday chesley!

Chesley is officially two years old today!  Can't believe it has been two years already!

daily aches, pains and whines

So today might i add...i'm beyond mad.  There is some kind of rage pulsing through every bit of me...i think it's the new medicine the doctor put me on...so i'm gonna stop taking it.  Oh and my stomache is in knots...ouch!  I'm so ready for a definite diagnosis!

Part I of potty training!

Today Chesley is wearing training panties....we'll see how it turns out:) 

synopsis as of 1/22/10

so i am a 27 mother of two, married to the sweetest man!  my children are both girls ages 7 and 2.  i have had a rough life that has included rape, drug addiction, pregnancy before marriage, money troubles and health problems.  i recently went on a church retreat that seems to have changed the way i look at things as well as my goals in life.  i am currently unemployed due to health problems.  i was denied disability and told that even though i meet the federal criteria for disability time and time again no judge would grant me disability due to my age.  this leaves my family in a very tough situation.  my husband is working two jobs to try to make ends meet but we are still coming up with less than half of what we need to pay the bills every month.  we have had to rely very heavily on our parents for groceries and school monies.  at the retreat i attended i was told something that i can't ever remember hearing growing up in the presbyterian church, they said any time you worry or get anxious just give it up to god and find peace that he has a plan.  i had never heard that before and it rocked my world!  i have been praying to god everyday to help me to give him all my worries and trust that he has a plan.  i want to get this heavy load off my chest and find peace.  so to the three of you that might ever stumble across my blog, please pray that i can find peace in god's plan because i have been living in worry and pain for far too long.

Hello!

Well hello world of blogging!  I am new...this is my first blog ever!  (yes i realize i am a decade behind)  Curious if anyone can make sugesstions as to what they would like for me to blog about?  I can write when i'm told what to write, of course i don't use proper punctuation, but just coming up with something seems to be a bit harder.  So i am asking for suggesstions:)